it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
