haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
