Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Dick very happy bro
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
