If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
