does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
