keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
