Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
