Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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