I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
we're so committed to being not committed
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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