We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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