did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
