anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
