He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
my poor anus
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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