I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Pants are for mortals
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize
