The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
