my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
my sisters under your porch take her home
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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