If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
