check it out our google latitudes are spooning
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
