Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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