The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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