Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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