I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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