Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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