Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
