all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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