Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
