i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize