4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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