I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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