I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
