O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
