Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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