you thought your balls were fighting each other...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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