we're chasing vodka with high fives
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
