ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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