hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
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