it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
There was a lot of him and a little penis
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
