i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
