you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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