i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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