i think i have herpe
just one?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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