Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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