ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Even my vagina gasped.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
