I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
