I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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