You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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