giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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