just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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