whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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