I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
